Don't get lost in transition

How to shift from one thing to another...even if you'd rather not

In writing about schedules, I’ve learned that people have different feelings about shifting from one task to another. A tiny boat can turn quickly; a big cargo ship needs a long time to change directions. It’s not that one is “better” than the other. They’re just built in different ways.

I’m more of a small craft myself. One of the things that has made it possible for me to work and raise five kids is that I consider any hour open for work or life. So when people are trying to figure out how to work long hours and still see their young kids, I’ll sometimes recommend what I call a “split shift.” You leave the office early, spend the evenings with small children who go to bed by 8 p.m., then do some more work at night after the kids are asleep. That way, you’re trading off work time for TV time, instead of work time for family time. Brilliant!

Some people agree with me that it is brilliant. They eagerly try the split shift and tell me how happy they are to spend more time with their kids while still getting things done professionally. They finally have it all!

Others think this sounds like the worst idea ever. Once they are done with work for the night, they are done. They are not going to turn the oil tanker around. Starting back up at 8:00 p.m. makes them feel, as one woman wrote, “ill with self-pity.” Or, if that seems like a bit much, substitute the word “ineffective.” By the time they get back into work mode, it’s time to go to bed. As an integrator type, I can think this sounds ridiculous, but we all have to know ourselves.

Becoming more agile

The trouble for the oil tanker types of the world is that life demands a lot of transitions. I heartily suggest you build your life to spend whole work days focused on one thing. Sounds great! But many people find that impossible. We have to transition between projects, between meetings and focused work, and now for many remote workers from home mode to work mode and then work mode to home mode without the separation of a commute. People can build their lives as they wish, but I also find it kind of sad that a family might strictly limit kids’ activities because the idea of having a swim meet and a band concert on the same day sounds overwhelming (really, truly, it isn’t! You can do this!).

While we all have our tendencies, we can also learn skills that allow us to function in different ways. I am not a natural social butterfly but I have learned to ask people about their weekends, or to remember some detail from our last conversation and ask about that. Likewise, folks who find transitions challenging can train their brains to get in the groove more quickly.

If you are going back and forth between work mode and personal mode, one approach is to come up with a ritual that provides a mental short cut for getting you in and out of each mode. If you work from home, you could create a fake commute. Make it short: You walk down to the end of the driveway to get your mail or the newspaper. Then you walk back in. Or you could walk to a nearby coffee shop if you have one. Then go straight back into your home office. The feel of that big cup of coffee and having moved yourself around can send your brain the signal that now it is time. Some people find that a particular song can put them in the right mood. You could have a “work time” song, and then you could have a “personal time” song. And yes, you can play each four times a day if you need to. Scents also have the ability to focus the brain quickly. I’m not sure what scent would make you feel like it’s work time (the jokes write themselves…) but this could be worth exploring.

Transitions are also easier when you know what you are supposed to be doing. We get lost in transition when we consider the universe of possibilities. You sit down at 8 p.m. for some split shift work and think you’ll get through a 1000 email backlog. You won’t. Before you leave the office, write down the 3 things you need to get through that night. That way, when you fire up the laptop, you have your marching orders and don’t have to put your brain through the additional calisthenics of deciding. Likewise, if you plan your days ahead of time, and know you have planned to write a proposal for 2 hours and then meet with John at 11 a.m. about the recent marketing campaign, you can march through these steps like you’re following a map, rather than hiking through uncharted terrain.

Shifting gears

Now, to be sure, one of the biggest challenges for the non-integrators among us is that some find it almost impossible to get non-urgent work done if they know there’s something coming up. That 11 a.m. meeting would keep flaring into their brain during the prior 2 hours (is it time yet? do I need to prepare anything?) and keep them from doing any sort of focused or creative work. If that is the case, it might help to tell yourself you can just do a little here and there. You’re just creating the titles for the slides. You’re just putting in this one picture you know will go there. You might trick yourself into doing a lot. But it’s probably just as effective to tell yourself it’s totally OK to focus — because you’ve set 10 alarms for the 20 minutes before that meeting with John. There’s no way you will miss it. When your brain knows it will be pulled out of one mode when it needs to be pulled out, it might be more willing to relax.

Finally, you can set up your physical environment to make transitions easier. If getting out the door is a long and involved process, any transition that involves going somewhere will feel harder. So keep all shoes and backpacks in a space by your door so you don’t have to hunt for them. Always put your keys (or purse/wallet) in the same place. Any sports equipment can be in its own bag that also stays near the door. It might help to think of the most common transitions you make and list what the major components are. When I’m bringing my two little boys to school in the morning, the main things are whether they are dressed (two mental check marks, one for each kid), whether they have eaten breakfast (two mental check marks) and whether they have lunches (two mental checkmarks). Their shoes and coats are by the door, so that’s easy enough. If all six boxes are mentally checked, everything else is gravy.

Do you find transitions easy? Or are they more challenging for you? What strategies have you come up with to keep from getting lost in transition?