You have free time - here's where to find it
A road map to finding and enjoying whatever leisure time you have
When I first started writing about time, I noticed that people liked to talk about having “no free time whatsoever.” Or if they did, it was incredibly limited. For instance, one survey from 2014 claimed that moms had just 17 minutes of “me time” per day.
I understand where this feeling of time scarcity comes from. Weekends spent chasing after small kids are not relaxing. During weekdays, there are always chores to do and places to go.
But after seeing thousands of time logs, I can promise that this bleak “17 minutes a day” statistic is not true. Most people — even busy people — do have a reasonable amount of leisure time, and many of us could enjoy the time we have more, and get more time, with some smart strategizing.
If you’re not sure where your free time could be hiding, here are some places to look.
At night. This one is probably obvious, as people often lament staying up too late watching Netflix or scrolling! But for many people, there is some point in the evening where the chores are done, or the kids are in bed. Try tracking your time for several evenings and see what you’re doing and how much time there is. If you finish cleaning up at 9 p.m. and start moving toward bed at 10:30 p.m., that’s 90 minutes. This is quite a bit of time! But even if it’s less, tracking can help you see how much time you’re actually working with.
Early morning. Most people are tired at night, which limits the leisure possibilities right before bed. But if you went to bed earlier, you might move some of that night time leisure to the early morning — before kids wake up, or before you’re getting ready for work. More varied things, like exercise, or creative pursuits, are possible when energy levels are a bit higher.
During workday breaks. Almost everyone takes some sort of break at work, even if it’s not intentional. Notice if you find yourself reading headlines for 20 minutes in the afternoon, or scrolling around on your phone after recuperating from a meeting. When you know where these breaks tend to happen, you might plan ahead to seize them for intentional leisure time, or else consolidate them (and be able to read a book or take a walk at lunch).
When kids are occupied. Even if you’re caring for kids, they are often doing something else, at least for a while. Perhaps they have sports or music lessons, or as they get older they might be playing with friends, or watching videos. Little kids might nap on weekends. This time might be repurposed for leisure.
By trading off. One of the best ways for people with caregiving responsibilities to find more leisure time is to trade off with other people. If you’re in a two-parent family, you might decide that each of you gets 2-3 hours on Saturday for your own fun while the kids are with the other parent. You might give each parent one night “off” from bedtime duty to go do something with friends or make time for a hobby. If you don’t have a co-parent to do this swap with, try it with another relative, friend, or neighbor. This one practice can vastly increase the amount of “uncontaminated” leisure time an adult can have.
By setting intentions. In many cases, leisure time doesn’t feel like free time because it wasn’t spent on anything fun. But that doesn’t mean it didn’t happen. In order to truly appreciate this time it helps to know what you’d like to do with it. So, even if you don’t believe you have a ton of leisure time, trying asking yourself what you’d do if you did have time. Make a list. Choose some things that take 30-60 minutes and a few that you could do in 5-10. Would you read? Work on a puzzle? Go for a walk? Listen to some of your favorite music? Do a hobby? Then look ahead to your next day or two and guess when a spot of free time might appear. Choose what you’d like to do. Then, when the time does appear, you’ll do something meaningful — and notice it. That, right there, can make whatever free time you do have feel far more substantial.