Shop for a hobby

How to figure out what you might enjoy doing

I think busy people deserve to have more fun in life. I’m always telling people to “take one night for you” — that is, devote a few hours a week to something that is not work, and is not caring for family members, and is intrinsically enjoyable for you.

Some people agree, and immediately sign up for an art class, or audition for a community orchestra, or phone the animal shelter to pick up a regular volunteer shift. But some people confess to a problem. They don’t know what they’d like to do with their time!

I get it. When we spend years doing nothing beyond work, and caring for family members, and sleeping, and then getting up to do it again, we can forget what we actually enjoy.

But if that sounds like you, don’t worry. I think you can find something. You can give yourself six months to find something you love — and go shopping for a hobby.

Look around

Just as you might shop for something else that could be a medium-sized commitment (like a sofa, a bicycle, or a vacation rental) you can shop for a hobby.

You might start by seeing what’s out there. Ask around — what do people enjoy doing on weekends? If everyone you know seems as busy as you, ask what their friends and neighbors do. Someone’s newly retired neighbor might have all sorts of hobbies and be a part of various community organizations, and that could give you a place to start. Check the bulletin boards at libraries or other community centers. Check listings at local places that put on a lot of programming, like colleges, or performance spaces, or commercial art or dance studios.

Make a list of what sounds vaguely intriguing. We’re not talking things you’d like to commit tons of hours to for years. What sounds like an enjoyable way to spend an hour or two, even on a one-off basis?

While you’re doing this, you can also think back to what you enjoyed in the past. What activities did you gravitate toward as a kid? They might not exactly work now — but something related might.

Try experimenting

Then, challenge yourself to try things over the next few weeks. Take a Saturday pottery class with a friend some week. Go to a bowling night that your church is hosting. Rent a kayak some nice evening, and see how it goes.

Some stuff will feel ridiculous. Other things might be more fun. If you find yourself feeling more energized by doing something, and you find yourself looking forward to a way to do it again, that’s a sign you’re headed in the right direction.

Keep experimenting. My guess is that if you try a lot of things out over 6 months, by the end of that time you’ll have something you want to make fit in your life more regularly. Knowing that will allow you to make more of a commitment. You sign up for a semester long adult tap dancing class, or you audition for a choir.

That said, even these first regular commitments might not last forever. Maybe you join one choir for a year, but in the course of singing with them, you meet three other people who you decide to form an a cappella group with. You then transition to that as your hobby. That’s fine too! Nothing needs to last forever.

But I think we often tell ourselves that we have no time, so there’s no point asking what we want to do with our time. So then people are stumped about what might be an enjoyable hobby. Spending a few months shopping for one can give you time to think — and increase the chances that you eventually find something fun.