How to work on vacation without driving your family (or yourself) crazy

Tips for making a working vacation more relaxing for everyone

I tend not to draw strict lines between work and the rest of life. Because I often do personal things — like exercise, or going to kid events — during the work day, I’m fine with doing some work at night and on weekends. I also tend to travel a lot with my family. To make that possible, I do some work on days that at least look like vacation days. I think there is a huge difference between being forced to work on your days off — which is not cool at all — and choosing to do some work because it allows you to take more days away.

If you fall into the latter camp, a few strategies can make everything go more smoothly.

First, choose unobtrusive times to work. If you are staying at one place (like at the beach) and you have little kids, one option is to spend the morning doing things with your family, and then work during nap time (1-3 p.m. more or less). Children who don’t nap can have screen time or otherwise relax. Then you all gather again for a late afternoon activity.

If you’re doing things like sightseeing, which will have you out and about all day, then your best bet for unobtrusive work is early morning. Go get coffee for everyone, set yourself up for an hour or so, and then rouse the crew for breakfast. This strategy works particularly well if you have teenagers who like to sleep until mid-morning or later on vacations. They won’t have any clue that you clocked a work shift while they were in bed.

Second — and this is a related point — do not work outside these windows without a good reason. Everyone will be happier about this arrangement if you don’t blow up a day’s plans just because work is busy. Work is always busy. Deal with it in the 7-9 a.m. window. If it didn’t fit, maybe it wasn’t quite so important.

You should also be careful about calling in favors from your spouse. The fact that you want to get some work done does not mean your spouse automatically wants to do more solo childcare. Especially if you plan to do a longer stint (like working a full day in the middle of a vacation) it would be most fair to volunteer to cover a day for your spouse, so he or she can do whatever. That could be work or something that’s fun for them. You might also arrange for childcare. We often have some babysitting help during our days at the beach each year so there’s less pressure on each of us.

I think it’s also wise to think through what work makes the most sense to do. There may be some routine check ins that you keep doing. You may not want to start anything huge or put big deadlines in the middle of your time away. On the other hand, if you think you will have some longer quiet stretches (maybe your teens all jet ski and you…do not jet ski) you could try thinking through some deeper questions, or doing some long-term planning. Think of it as a mini-retreat!

And finally, challenge yourself not to let work seep into the small moments when you could be doing something else. Sure, it’s easy to check email while sitting with a kid who’s going to sleep, and there’s nothing wrong with doing that. But if you’re trying to get more of the vacation vibe, you might read an ebook instead. Set up a puzzle, so you do that in slow moments while you’re waiting for the kids to get their swimsuits on. Most likely you wouldn’t solve any huge problems in those little email checks, so it can all wait until later.