Control what comes in

One way to make self-control easier

My kids, like most people, like to snack. I have one child who would probably eat nothing but Cheez-Its if left to his own devices. But if I don’t have Cheez-Its in the house, that becomes a lot more difficult. Sometimes Cheez-Its are a treat when we’re out and near a vending machine. But if they’re not in the pantry, then life doesn’t become a battle of monitoring exactly how many Cheez-Its have been eaten.

In general, in life, I think it’s better to control what comes in, rather than having to supervise a lot of choices afterwards. For instance, it’s easier to avoid soda if you don’t buy it at the grocery store. If you have to go out into the world to purchase a soda when you want one, 9 out of 10 times you will rethink that. And if you do go out and purchase it, great. It’s probably a special treat.

Controlling what comes in can be a good strategy for clutter as well. I remember once steering a child away from asking for a set that involved 100 small scented erasers. I pictured myself picking these up in sets of 2-3 from around the house for years…and suggested something a little pricier but featuring fewer pieces.

I’ve been doing something similar with social media. You can’t completely control the algorithm, of course. But if I notice that certain accounts irritate me, or make me start reading the arguments in the comments…it’s better to unfollow.

Making spot decisions on many things can be draining. When you control what comes into your house, or even into your inbox, or into your life in general, you can limit the number of decisions you need to make. You know that everything has met a certain standard. After that? It’s all good.