Bribe yourself

Make it a little sweeter to do what your better self wants to do

If you read any of the literature on motivation, you know that intrinsic motivation is powerful. People who love to run are far more likely to stick with running than people who would rather be doing just about anything but running. I can always tell when someone has just been told they should start a blog because it’s a good way to build a platform…but they don’t really want to. They often will do it, exactly once per week, at the same time. Whereas people who really want to blog will post multiple times per week, often on varying days and at varying times, simply because they enjoy having the forum for expression.

That said, there are plenty of things that we need to do that we’re never going to be intrinsically motivated to do. Going to the dentist, for instance. Exercise no doubt falls in this category for many people. No one needs to run, or play a particular sport, but it’s going to be hard to stay healthy long-term without moving one’s body to some degree.

Which is why it is wise to come up with compelling external motivations. Yes, you should bribe yourself.

The price is right

If there is something you don’t particularly want to do, think about what would sweeten the deal. Kids sometimes get little trinkets for going to the doctor or dentist. What would be your equivalent? If you’ve taken a half day of PTO to go to a medical appointment, maybe you could meet a friend with a more flexible schedule for coffee or a during-the-day adventure afterwards. You can promise yourself that after that unpleasant-but-necessary preventative screening, you can go buy that new novel you’ve been desiring…or go home and watch a movie.

With ongoing things, you might need to be more creative about the bribe, as you can’t exactly promise yourself a few hours of PTO after every bout of exercise (oh, if only). One option is to bundle exercise with some media consumption. Find a podcast you love that comes out three times a week and only listen to it on the treadmill. Same with a favorite TV show. You can watch it…at the gym (I got through a lot of bad-weather January treadmill runs watching Oprah at 4 p.m. back in the day).

Double up

For many people, the best way to bribe yourself to exercise is to get an exercise partner. Theoretically this is for the accountability, but this moves more into the category of “bribe” if hanging out with your exercise partner would be a highlight of the day. Let’s put it this way: If you don’t like exercise, find an exercise buddy you like a lot! But ideally someone who’s also really looking to exercise so you don’t just decide to move your friendship to a twice-a-week happy hour.

Though happy hour can be a bribe too. There’s a reason managers take their teams out for drinks or dinner to celebrate the end of a tough project. If you don’t have a boss, then sometimes you need to come up with your own professional bribes. Make a dinner reservation for you and three friends for the day after you turn in something big. Let them know you are looking forward to this as your reward. You’ll probably push yourself to get it in on time.

To be sure, as adults, we can make nice things happen for ourselves even without doing whatever it is we’re trying to bribe ourselves to do. There’s nothing stopping you from canceling that doctor’s appointment but still buying your book/outfit/movie ticket/cocktail/etc. But if you’re the sort of person who’s reading a newsletter like this, my guess is that you are fairly future-focused and able to keep a promise you make to yourself. It’s just that sometimes promises are easier to keep when there’s a little extra something dangling out there as a reward. So figure out what that sweet something is, and you might get yourself to do whatever it is your better self wants to do.